How Do You Oreo?

Oreo1Everyone must know about Oreo Cookies. right? Well I suppose unless you live in the jungles of South America…or Mars. The memories come flooding back when I hear the jingle “Oh,oh,oh, ice cold milk and an Oreo Cookie. They forever go together, it’s a classic combination. When a dark, delicious cookie meets an icy cold sensation. Like the one and only creamy, crunchy, chocolate, O-R-E-O… Keeps your mouth from getting lonely!” Ahh, what a walk down memory lane!

So the question of the ages, or maybe just the question of right now is “How do YOU eat your Oreo’s?”

Cookie lickersThe Licker:

The Licker is the person who has to carefully open the Oreo cookie to expose its creamy sugary center. Whether you’re a twist and pull  personality or you yank the cookie open like a book all willy nilly like. Your one main goal is to reach the glorious inside so you can lick the frosting all on its own, without the chocolate cookie getting in the way. Sometimes you have to be careful not to swipe too big of a lick, because you can lose the whole gooey goodness in one fell swoop if you get too exuberant! Then your stuck with nothing but cookie! And we can’t have that now can we? Nope, I thought not. 🙂

dunk-oreo-cookie-milk-without-getting-your-fingers-messy.w654The Dunker:

Ahh yes, the dunker! Whether it’s coffee, hot chocolate, ice cream or the ever favorite ice cold milk!!! You just love to splash that little chocolaty disk of heaven into whatever the medium may be like a baptism in the lake. Do you just make the dunk just a quick little dip to barely coat the cookie with whatever yer dunkin preference is? Or… do you leave it submersed, saturating the cookie until it inevitably falls apart in your fingers and drops to the bottom of the glass? C’mon, tell me you haven’t done just that at least once?  It is a regular occurrence for me to have to go spelunking for my Oreo at the bottom of the cup! Isn’t that what spoons are made for anyways? 😉

The big biteThe All Consuming Biter:

I think of this category involves the instant gratification type personality. They need the blend of both cookie and creamy frosting all in one all consuming bite. Maybe you’re the pop the whole cookie into your pie hole kind of person? Allowing your tongue to go into overdrive to get it to all corners of your mouth at once, overloading your taste buds one cookie at a time! Or maybe you could be the record player biter? Nibbling your way around the edges of the cookie making your way one little tidbit at time towards the center before you take that last gratifying chomp.

Seperate the cookie halfsAs I am sure there are a multitude of ways one can eat an Oreo, but my personal favorite is a combination of the licker and the dunker. I like to carefully separate the two halves, because it’s important to ensure that the frosting stays on one side ya know!! The world will get thrown into chaos if it doesn’t! Cats and dogs living together… what was I saying again? Oh yeah! My personal technique. So… after the two halves have been delicately disunited, I go to town on the frosting! My tongue leaving nothing but ruin and devastation in its wake, until I have cleaned the cookie down to it’s own Individual element. Then I set the cookie parts aside for later consumption.

One does not eat just oneI eagerly move onto cookie number two (how many really depends upon what I think I get away with at that particular sitting. And not get yelled at by my wife!) and I repeat the process, again setting aside the lowly cookie aside until the end of my frosting feast. Then I utilize my ice cold glass of milk that has been sitting patiently at my side. Each cookie will takes it’s turn receiving a milk bath until they are almost at the critical saturation point, just before they dissolve and plummet to the bottom of the glass. Then plopping the once crispy cookie unceremoniously into my mouth to savor the chocolaty cookie mush! Mmm mmm mmmmm! To finish this celebration of righteous awesomeness the waiting glass of milk pours down my throat in one ginormous gulp. Washing the palate clean and ready for another taste extravaganza to become one with my taste buds!

Well there you have it folks, everything you ever wanted to know (as I know it’s been on your mind 😉 ) about how I eat my Oreo Cookies! So… which one are you?

Stay safe, stay warm and be kind to each other.


About Kevin Powley

Creating chaos is the name of the game! Okay, maybe there is a little more to it than just chaos, like I'm a transplanted Canadian living in Wisconsin. Why the Cheesehead capital of the world you may ask? Okay, so you didn't but I'm going to tell you regardless. Love! Plain and simple, I'm here for love. What am I into? Well back in 2003... ish I bought my first guitar, now I own 7. I turned a spare bedroom into a little recording studio where I write and record my own music. Unfortunately I cannot read music. (Maybe a little to ADD to sit for lessons I guess?) But I love it, even though I don't set aside enough time to play much anymore. I'm a Gamer, an avid reader and I love to write. Every chance I get I take in the newest movie on the big screen. The bigger the blockbuster the bigger the screen to watch it upon! Currently I am enrolled in school and taking some courses to get a degree in nursing. I'm changing the path of my life once again, even though I am in my mid forties. Never to old to try something new I say! I live here in beautiful Wisconsin right smack dab in between Chicago and Milwaukee. Where we get to experience both worlds equally. I have been married to my gorgeous wife Susi for the past 12 years and have a furry family taking up my attention. My old Husky/Shepherd Buddy and our three cats Fletcher, Taiko and Felix. Who needs kids when you have all these guys to keep you busy? And busy they do keep us! :)
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2 Responses to How Do You Oreo?

  1. Anonymous says:

    I’m a biter. 2 bites and it’s gone! My best friend’s mom used to stock her cupboards with Oreos that were only for me. Back in the days when calories didn’t matter because nothing would sit on my hips, it was not uncommon for me to finish off an entire bag in one sitting.

    • Kevin Powley says:

      I hear ya! My days of knawing a package of cookies to its end is a thing of the past as well. But if you have the kind of sweet tooth like I do, they still whisper to you! 😉

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